Alex Rodriguez had sex with Rosie O’Donnell. No wait, better yet Madonna.
Has it really been a year? Where does the time go?
You read it right folks, it’s been exactly a year since Boston Bob started writing for the greatest website on the planet. A lot has happened in this past year. I have even more planned for the one still to come.
So what do ya say we reminisce, and look in to the future? Sounds good don’t it? Don’t it???
If you hit up sportsbook and bet with Boston Bob this past year you probably have no money for food let alone internet services so there is a good chance you are not reading this. If you happen to be sitting at the local library surfin their net and borrowing their movies because Blockbuster is now obviously out of the budget I want to sincerely apologize.
Last year I was as off like the light switch in my bedroom. Get it, cause it’s always off. Always women in there is what I’m gettin at. And not women you want to see in good lighting either. Ya feel me???
But last year I had a prediction for pretty much everything out there and scanning through the articles can’t for the life of me find one that is correct. Now if I were a man who apologized here is definitely a time I’d say sorry.
What can you expect this year? Same damn thing if you’re stupid enough to let it. I’d hope even a moron would stop following me after my kabillion and sixth wrong one in a row but you never know. I myself didn’t, I instead decided to just stop paying. It doesn’t suck as bad when you lose. Then again it really isn’t that big a deal when you win either. One thing I will promise is I won’t predict divisions next year. My AL Central Prediction…what a piece of crap that was!
So here is my warning to you…my disclaimer. I Suck @ Predictions, if you bet it you will lose (say that all whispery like in Field of Dreams, that’ll scare you away). And for those that read but simply have WAY too much money and thus are going to bet anyway I also have an idea for you; mail it to me. Email me and I’ll get you my address, send me as much cash as you want and I promise I’ll find something to do with it. Something D comes to mind…irty Prostitutes I want to say but it’s a little fuzzy still, I’d really need the cash to get the HD picture.
What else has happened in this past year? Oh yeah, I did my version of Twas The Night Before Christmas…KILLED IT!!! Actually one of my favorite things so far on Fenwayparkfans. Or pretty much in life! I’d say it goes invention of implants, microwave oven, my creation of Night Before. Now we can argue flip flopping two and three all day long but I’m not wavering on number one.
Can we expect something similar this year perhaps? Maybe a Night Before Christmas Remix???
How bout this one?
Twas Thanksgivin Day
The turkey was bakin
The place smelled the bomb
No bitch I ain’t fakin
I’m still working on it but it’ll probably be something a little similar to that. Maybe tweak it a little though…just a little. Either way be ready for that AND if you’re lucky something like this:
Twas the day after Halloween
All the stuff was marked down
Two bucks for a mask
Guess next year I’m a clown
Still tweakin that one too but I’m pretty sure it’s going to be about all the delightful bargains they have the day after the Holiday is finally over.
I remember buying my maid out of the back of a dark blue van the day after Mothers Day. I wasn’t really in the market for a maid but her kids were selling her and I just couldn’t pass up the price. My buddy Brian was over a couple weeks after I got her and sees her for the first time; said her kids tried to sell her to him ON Mothers Day for almost double what I paid. Coincidence? I think not!
Anyway, some of the better “reporting” that I did last year was breaking the whole A Rod steroids story just a few minutes after ESPN, MSN, ABC, NBC, CBS, Fox, CNN and Tom the guy who works across the hall did but I nailed it just the same. They have more resources and I’m better looking; who wins? I’ll tell you who, the guy getting laid, that’s who!
Can we expect more top notch reporting out of me this year? You bet your ass you can. That tight athletic ass of yours. Both sexy and shapely, something you’d simply like to take a bite out of.
Sorry, I’m writing this naked in the mirror again, it’s a bitch to concentrate.
But back to this year, yes you can! In fact I GUARANTEE you that I will get an exclusive story on this website if I have to make it up myself. And I will! In fact, let’s start right now.
Alex Rodriguez had sex with Rosie O’Donnell. No wait, better yet Madonna.
He what? He did? That’s the sickest thing I have ever heard. Next time I will bring my Grandmother to the game, he’ll probably whiff every time staring down her top. You are a sick sick man Alex…a sick sick man!
Madonna?
Really?
Really???
Disgusting.
I’m truly sick. I haven’t felt this dirty since the Golden Girls dream.
And with that I close.
Thanks for reading this past year and watch for more of the same to come. Or better…if you think this past year has sucked. Yeah, better…way better!
For FenwayParkFans.com...Boston Bob Out!